Ask the person’s permission.
“Can I tell you what I felt while listening to you?” Instead of suddenly announcing the content of your feedback, ask permission in advance so that the other person can prepare himself/herself.
Use “I-messages”.
The “I-message” is a way of communicating by using “I” as the subject, as in “I feel like a〇〇〇 “
Example: I have a feeling that there is something else you really want to say.
On the other hand, in “You message,” “you” becomes the subject. When “you” is used as the subject, it tends to be perceived as a judgment or preconceived notion on the part of the coach, and it prevents the client from becoming aware of the situation on his/her own. If there is not enough trust in the relationship, there is a risk of backlash.
Example: There must be something else you really want to do.
Say a combination of objective facts and subjective perceptions.
For example, based on the objective fact, “You have a furrowed brow,” say, “To me, it feels like you have something to worry about,” which is a subjective perception, or what you feel as a coach.
Or, based on the objective fact that “you used the word ‘but’ five times,” the coach says, “I don’t think you really want to do that….
In this way, combining objective facts with subjective perceptions makes it easier for the client to accept. However, the coach’s subjectivity is subject to interpretation, so use caution when using it.
Confirm what the coach feels.
Example: From what you’ve told me, it sounds like you’ve already decided on a conclusion.
Feedback is only effective when the client is able to accept it.
コーチング情報局を運営する株式会社コーチビジネス研究所では、企業を対象としたコーチング研修、ビジネスパーソンを対象としたビジネスコーチング、個人の方を対象としたライフコーチングを提供しております。その他、コーチングを学びたい方のためのコーチングスクールの運営、経営者やビジネスリーダー向けにセミナーを開催しています。興味や関心がございましたら、お気軽にご相談・お問い合わせください。
This article was written in Japanese and converted into English using a translation tool. We hope you will forgive us for any inadequacies.
Coach Business Laboratory, Inc., which operates the Coaching Information Bureau, provides coaching training for companies, business coaching for business people, and life coaching for individuals. In addition, we operate a coaching school for those who want to learn coaching and hold seminars for executives and business leaders. If you are interested or have any questions, please feel free to contact us for further information and consultation.
