Eric Berne, the founder of Transactional analysis, presented the concept of the “Three Ego States”. He identified three basic forms of human interaction, which have the following characteristics. This is “Patterns of Transaction”.
1. Complementary Transactions
Mr. A: “Where are the documents relating to this matter kept?”
Mr. B: “They are over there in the second cabinet from the top.
In such an exchange where arrows are drawn in parallel, communication is smooth because the relationship between the two parties is in line with what is expected of them. This is the natural flow of a healthy relationship.
2. Crossed Transactions
Mr. A: “Where are your papers on this matter kept?”
Mr. B: “You are always so sloppy! You should at least remember where everything you need for your job is!”
Even though Mr. A spoke up very normally and calmly, Mr. B responded to Mr. A with a critical P
3. Ulterior Transactions
Ms. A: “I was busy too, but I took care of that job…” (I did your share of the work, so you should thank me…)
Mr. B (in a casual tone) “Oh, well, thank you very much…” (What? You are so condescending about something as trivial as that…)
In this exchange, at first glance, it appears that an exchange between A and B is taking place between the two. However, behind each other’s words, there are hidden messages of other meanings in their attitudes, actions, and tone of voice.
The other person’s reaction is a clue to understanding the state of his or her ego.
When one person is critical of the other with a critical P, the other often becomes a submissive C. When one person is protective of the other with a protective P, the other becomes a free C and tends to express his or her feelings more easily.
Understanding the ego state of the other person leads to looking at one’s own ego state. The other person’s reaction is a clue to understanding one’s own ego state.
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This article was written in Japanese and converted into English using a translation tool. We hope you will forgive us for any inadequacies.
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